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Writer's pictureMarybeth Haines

Healing Guidance - 4 Steps To Find Clarity Under Stress



As humans living in a fast paced society, we are inundated with deadlines, societal pressures, financial stresses and much, much more. We tend to overthink things because we are so unfocused on what we truly desire. Stress easily overtakes us and we become overwhelmed. Does this ring a bell for you?


When healing from the loss of a pet, we often find ourselves digging deeper into these levels of stress and need to find clarity to our inner thoughts, feelings and emotions. We need to remember to take care of ourselves, as it’s when we take care of us that we can then take care of our family, daily needs and tasks/routines.


Each day, before I start my work, I take a few minutes to strategize and prioritize what I need to do that day. By doing this, my work is done more efficiently and with less stress. Essentially, I create a roadmap in which I follow for that day. Without my roadmap, I tend to become lost easily…especially when under stress.




Recently, I had several tasks that needed to get done and at the same time, I was experiencing sadness over what had happened recently with my little guy Mr. Mooshie. He had been undergoing some medical testing and we needed to look at his quality of life. I had been experiencing deep feelings of guilt as a couple weeks prior, I had made an error in his medication dosage, not giving him enough. I was feeling that I had caused a direct impact on his health by this error and that it was my fault for what happened. This was interfering with my day and I needed help.


Living a busy lifestyle with a business that is booming, I need to be on my toes all the time. I am unable to be there for those I serve if I cannot be present with myself. On this day, I had my roadmap but I found myself frozen in what to do next. My feelings overwhelmed me and I knew I needed to make a choice. I could choose to stay paralyzed or choose to take action. I chose to take action.


I realized that as I needed time to process my feelings of guilt, I also was trying too hard by overthinking what it was that I needed. We sometimes spend so much time thinking about where we are stuck that we miss out on taking any kind of action. Not only that, when we begin to overthink, we tend to contemplate other’s expectations for us. It is when we can release ourselves from that moment, leave our minds and drop into our bodies; we can connect with an internal tool that is always there for us. We just need to make the decision to use it.


With healing, no two people are the same. Just as a snowflake is unique, so are you. Therefore, you know what you need more than anyone else does. Now is the time to turn to the most valuable tool you will ever find…YOU!




4 Simple Steps in Finding Clarity Under Stress


1) Breathe – Now is the time to just notice your breathing. How do you do this you ask? Let’s take it step by step:

  • TAKE A FEW SECONDS, CLOSE YOUR EYES AND NOTICE YOUR BREATH.

  • PAY ATTENTION TO NOTICE HOW IT FEELS AS THE AIR MOVES IN AND OUT OF YOUR LUNGS.

  • DOES YOUR CHEST EXPAND AS YOUR LUNGS FILL WITH AIR OR DO YOU NOTICE THAT YOUR STOMACH MOVES IN AND OUT WITH EACH BREATH?

  • REMEMBER: THERE IS NO RIGHT OR WRONG WAY HERE…THE INTENTION IS TO JUST BE A WITNESS TO YOUR BREATHING.

2) Allow – On your next breath and as you exhale, open your eyes. Relax your eyes while allowing your gaze to view and just look ahead of you. You may find that your vision becomes unfocused and things may appear blurred. This is okay.


3) Refocus – Begin to refocus your eyes and allow your gaze to come back into focus and look around again at your same surroundings. Do you notice anything different? Perhaps you see more clarity to your vision of what you would normally see? Do things look the same, or do they appear just a bit different?


4) Realign – Close your eyes again and go back to noticing your breath. As a witness, sense how you are breathing now. What do you notice? Is your breath more calm and relaxed? Bring your awareness to your breathing and continue to breathe slowly in and out.


This was a very simple exercise however one that can be challenging under stress. Did you know that it is impossible to fully focus on 2 things at once? What you have just experienced by doing the above, was taking your attention away from your thoughts.

When you bring your attention to your breath, you are no longer inside your thoughts, you are free of them…even if for a few seconds. You can then become present and in the moment and from this point you have full access to your own needs, your own truth and your true desires.


Next time you find yourself needing clarity, focus and support from stress, give this exercise a go! And then message me by CLICKING HERE and let me know how it went. I can’t wait to hear from you.


Empowering your forward!


Marybeth Haines

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